Trouble is brewing in the Guidance Office.

According to a shocking new report, Senior Class Secretary Molly Thomas used her own personal email account to conduct her business, violating stringent regulations against the usage of private email servers for government business.

Attached to the report, published on WikiLeaks by a user only identified as “Zed” were thousands of leaked emails that were retrieved from Thomas’ compromised private server. Many of these messages have been found to be containing extremely sensitive information. “Ugh my parents arent letting me go to powderpuff,” says one email addressed to her trusted aides. “What did you get for question 4 on the calc hw??”, reads another.

This turn of events is alarming to many students. Distrust and disillusionment in the Belmont High School establishment had already been growing in response to the failure of the administration to address the grievances of the student body. “They just don’t listen to us anymore,” says senior Alex La Roche. “We want better bathrooms. We want to eat in the library cubicles. But the establishment just wants to protect their special interests. We know Richards is paying them off. ” Junior Miriam Cubstead strongly agrees. “Crooked Molly thinks she’s above the law when she’s clearly unfit to be Class Secretary. Sad!”

In other news, Senior Class Treasurer Lennart Nielsen has been caught reciting a sacrificial chant on a leaked audio clip. When asked about this, La Roche defended Nielsen’s comments. “This is just the rigged media distracting us from the real issues. Lenny will make BHS great again.”

 

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